THE14DAYEXPERIMENT.COM

POSITIVE STIMULI by Sheri Hunter

 

Even though I am a goal oriented person I feel like I have been stuck on stupid lately. Meaning, I have this enormous dream I want to satisfy and know it is a directive from God (completing my novel), but I have been allowing negative words to set inside my head. That's why I am glad to take part in this experiment and will not let previous roadblocks like self-doubt, procrastination, and fear set in.

Since I started the experiment I have been giving myself positive stimuli. When I write, I don't critique and criticize every word and therefore stop before completion. I keep writing and will worry about perfecting in the upcoming drafts. When I write, I do not picture some agent or editor drumming their nails in boredom and trashing my manuscript with all the other losers. When I write, I will not speculate on the mindless research or the endless hours at the computer or the laundry not getting done. Moving forward, I will write with purpose, one step, one page at a time knowing that God has not given me the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

I feel really good about this experiment...confident and able.

PRAISE HIM by Sheri Hunter

My key word for today is hijack. I'm not going to let anyone hijack, pilfer, or rob me of my dream...including myself. Have you heard that song...I've got a feeling by the Blackeyed Peas?  It goes...

 

I've gotta feeling that tonight's gonna be a good night
that tonight's gonna be a good night
that tonight's gonna be a good good night.

 

I've got a feeling too...and believe it's more than just a feelin. It is ME taking baby steps to fulfilling what God has already mapped out for myself. Praise Him!!

CONSCIENTIOUS EFFORT by Barbara Seldon

 
 

The reality is…I must change. If I don’t I will reduce my life expectancy significantly. My goal is to make a conscientious effort to address my eating habits, my relationship with food and my food choices in order to keep my diabetes under control.  I plan to make a conscientious effort for the next 14 days to evaluate everything that I eat. I plan to keep a daily record of every morsel of food and drink that I consume and record the times.  Then, I can look back and see just what I am doing wrong.  

 In order to do this right I have decided to take diabetes classes. I have been a diabetic since 1993, but have never gone to educational classes. Yesterday, I attended my first class at the Henry Ford Medical Center.  One of the good things about going to class was I saw other people like myself with the same issue. Some were much younger than me. Some were older (but not much). The class was psychologically motivating. I really want to be that 60 year old female in a 40 year old body.

CONSCIOUS by Barbara Seldon

I am so conscious about what I put into my mouth.  Today I did not cheat and I did not snack.  My glucometer reading at 8 AM was 143.  My reading at 6:12 PM was 127. These readings are so much better my previous readings at over 200.  What I’ve discovered is not only was I lying to my coworkers, and my husband, but I was also lying to myself. Diabetes does not hurt until it’s too late and the impact of uncontrolled diabetes in irreversible and deadly.

 

 

READY TO LEARN by William Wilbourn

 

 

Ok, today is my first blog.

I need assistance in deciding where to put all my focus.

I am motivated, humble, and ready to learn. 

 

A NEW OPPORTUNITY by Michelle Merritt

  

  

 
 

I am burned out from an entire lifetime of disappointment and mishaps. I am willing to open once again and embrace this moment as a new opportunity. So that is my goal for this 14-day experiment:  re-opening and staying open to possibility, no matter how long it takes for what I need to happen.  

PRESSURE by Monica Morgan

 
 

I slightly press the shutter...click!...it seems as if everything is out of focus...too many colors, sizes, shapes....projects. Too many things to do...I yearn for rest and sleep yet know that I thrive on being busy...I'm trying to take a snapshot of so many things....my photography business, The Who's Who in Black Detroit 4th edition which I'm publishing, my children's digital photography class, The F.A.W.N project for my church, photo assignments, upcoming assignments, sales appointments, scheduling appointments, organizing my home and studio, physical therapy, water aerobics, ballroom dancing, fun, a life....

I'm pressure prompted...I work so much better under pressure, but I hate the stress involved. I'd like to be able to multi-task without waiting for the last minute.

  

My focal point was clear... to continue to "dust myself off and start over" after having both of my knees totally replaced with metal on March 10. I had a new outlook on life, I was losing weight, feeling better about myself, looking better after almost a 40 pound weight loss, looking for new challenges...trying to have a life, doing new things-ballroom dance classes...I even thought about roller skating again and then within the last few weeks, I've gained 12 pounds and my exercise regiment has lost its momentum for me...I'm slipping back into old eating habits, my skin is breaking out, I'm tired and not very motivated...click..click..click...fuzzy images-dry and abstract...no color.

  

I need to get my focus back-to multitask better, to eat more healthy, to exercise and to have some fun. I was almost there when I started this project...

 

Monica Morgan International Photojournalist 500 River Place Drive Brownstone #5109 Detroit, MI 48207 (313) 259-7005 (studio) (313) 259-4454 (fax) www.MonicaMorganPhotography.com 

A NEW PERSPECTIVE by Monica Morgan

 
 
It's morning and things are in better focus...better depth of field...a new perspective...I'm going to make better choices when I have a meal....I'm going to lose those 12 pounds.....I'm on my way to the pool to do water aerobics and possibly the treadmill as well...if I don't do the treadmill, I will when I go to physical therapy later today. I'm claiming the weight loss...

  

Monica Morgan International Photojournalist 500 River Place Drive Brownstone #5109 Detroit, MI 48207 (313) 259-7005 (studio) (313) 259-4454 (fax) www.MonicaMorganPhotography.com 

A LITTLE BETTER by Barbara Seldon

 
  

Today is Friday Morning. I looked back at my habits on Wednesday. I am doing a little better. I learned that I have to regulate the portions of food that I eat. I went into the University for my H1N1 Flu shot. For breakfast I had a slice of bacon and a slice of toast with a pad of butter and a teaspoon on pear preserve.

  

I had just returned from Newton, Alabama. People in Southern Alabama still can their fruits and vegetables. So I brought back pear preserves.  My snack was a Neapolitan ice cream sandwich. I made sure I took my metforman medicine before I ate the ice cream. See, one of the things that I had been doing wrong was I would eat and maybe take my medicine later in the day. This is bad. You MUST take your medicine prior to eating. If you don't you will have high sugar levels in the blood and the medicine will be working to reducing them instead of your next meal.

   

Something else I learned is that I must divide my 9' plate into halves and then into quarters.  1/4th of the plate should be a carbohydrate food portion, 1/2 the plate should be vegetables and salads, and 1/4th the plate should be a meat. This is a good way to keep the carb portions at a lower level and reduce my intake of sugars. Carbohydrates break down quickly to sugars.

MAKE SOME CHANGES BY Barbara Seldon

My progress on my goal to get my eating habits under control is going fairly. One of the things I have noticed is that I have to make some changes in the foods that I keep at home - raisin bread, peanut butter, vanilla ice cream, graham crackers, cola, vernors. These foods are staples in my kitchen and available all of the time. I need to get up the courage to throw them away; just toss them in the trash can. I haven't done it, but it is on my mind.

 

I have been going out to dinner to restaurants and making great food choices. My blood sugars 2 hours after my dinners have been about 125. I have also noticed that I don't need as much insulin. I am pretty sure my insulin will be reduced when I return to my endocrinologist.

 

EXPECTATION by Sheri Hunter

 

I sent two of my short stories to twelve publications and received one rejection letter from ONE STORY. I also completed 2,000 words towards my novel in progress bringing the word count to 75k.  And, what do I focus on…the Rejection from the ONE STORY. It will go in the pile with the others. Mind you, even with previous publications under my belt I still dread rejection letters. Dread!!

I will need to work each day to focus on positive aspects of my life and not negative ones.  With my writing, my goal is to do 2,000 words each day. Some days I only do 200, or 20, but then I’ll write say 3,000 or more the next. Same with freelance writing – I reach out to various editors each day. Sometimes I get a nibble…sometimes I don’t. But, each day is a step towards realizing all the dreams and desires in my heart.

Positive word stimuli for today: hunger. I seek God’s favor on the ravenous gulf of expectation that is stored in the pit of my soul. Like a child waiting to be fed, I know my Savior will feed me until I am full.

 

TOUGH LOVE by William Wilbourn

 

 

 This is my second time blogging. I have had a lot of time to reflect.  Ms. Bettie really gave me some tough love. I needed it though. I really have uncovered that I am lazy. That had to come from God because if anyone ever said that I would fight tooth and nail to prove that I wasn’t.

I don’t think I’m lazy in the traditional sense, but I don’t want to use the gifts that God has given me and all the wisdom that I have learn over my years to succeed in life, love, and happiness. I couldn’t understand for a long time why I could help everyone else with their problems but I couldn't help myself. My pastor told me one Sunday as I went to him to pray over me that my name “William” means wisdom. 

But getting back to my laziness…I wanted someone to show me what to do and how to do it instead of listening to God’s voice and being that real grown man.  You see, I listen to him for helping others…but just not myself.  Tell me what you think about that.   

FOOD ADDICTION

 

As I read my comments I know that the biggest change that I have to address is my food addiction issue. Yes, I love food. I love to eat.  So, today, I printed a picture of an alligator and placed it on my refrigerator and my kitchen cabinet doors. I hate alligators. I think they are very ugly animals; uglier than snakes. I hope the association will help me to hate eating the wrong foods.

  

 

I am trying to evaluate my desire for food. When I feel the need to eat, I ask myself, "are you really hungry?" The desire seems to pop up right after I complete a task. I think this is a habit that I have gotten into.  Lately I’ve been fight the urge and I think I am eating less.

One of the things I have noticed is that I’m going to have to make some changes in the foods that I keep at home - raisin bread, peanut butter, vanilla ice cream, graham crackers, cola, and vernors. These foods are staples in my kitchen and available all of the time. I need to get up the courage to throw them away; just toss them in the trash can. I haven't done it, but it is on my mind.

 I also need to increase my exercise. I have a tread mill, but find it boring. I sometimes walk, but walking alone is no fun. I am a member of Fitness USA, but I have difficulty finding time to get there. I need some ideas on how to get at least 3 hours of exercise into my schedule every week.

 

LOOKING FORWARD by Michele Merritt

 

I began writing this post Sunday, but I was too tired, after catering a small event, to complete it. After reading, then re-reading Psalm 107:23-32, I honed in on verses 25-30. I still don’t understand why God “spoke and stirred up a tempest that lifted high the waves”, but the point was that after “their courage melted away” and “they were at their wit’s end…they cried out to the Lord in their trouble”.

I have continued to pray and have even tried to step it up some, but life continues to implode around me. While I feel that I can only handle things one day or issue at a time, I try to remain calm and practice being faithful. This chapter says, in verses 8, 15, 21, and 31, that they gave “thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love”. That is what I hold on to -to make it through, to keep going.

I am actually looking forward to having something to look forward to- and I have no idea what it will be. I only know that things can’t possibly get any worse. For now, I give myself points for getting out of bed, leaving the house and working well with others.

START AGAIN AND AGAIN by Barbara Seldon

 
 

Today is Tuesday morning. I went to my last Diabetes class last night. There is so much information. It is almost overwhelming. My next step is to meet with my Diatitian and set up a daily meal plan that I must follow.    

But, last night I failed. I saw that alligator on the door, but I bypassed and ate peanut butter and crackers at about 2:30 AM.  I had been doing so good. Taking my meds prior to eating, following my doctors instructions about just how and when the medicine should be administered. I was feeling so good about my 14 day experiment.

   

Kim, I remember you saying: Dust yourself off and start again and again and again.  So I am beginning again. This time, If get up in the early morning to  eat (such a bad habit) I will be prepared to drink water first hopefully to get that full feeling and return to bed.

 

I FEEL GREAT by Barbara Seldon

 
 

This has really opened my eyes. Diabetes doesn't hurt or make you feel badly. It doesn't prevent you from functioning.  Over time diabetes can eat at your internal organs (heart, brain, eyes, kidney, etc...) and take your life. But if controlled properly, a person can live a healthful and happy life.

I am going to see my endocrinologist and get retested, so soon know just how successful I have been since I started. My nurse says I am doing the right things. She thinks I will be pleasantly surprised.

I went to a house warming and the menu consisted of all the traditional African American Menu: The Feet of the Pig, Fried Chicken, Fried Fish, Chitterlings, ribs, Cole Slaw, Spaghetti, Mac and Cheese, Corn Bread, Greens, String Beans, salad, deserts, and cookies and candies, punch, beer, spirits, and water.  Boy did I make good choices. It was so much that I did not even desire to eat.

Now, is it improper to taste? I took just a taste of the meats and none of the fried fish, chicken or ribs. I had a whopping salad with vinegar and oil dressing, lots of greens and beans, a portion of corn bread, and lots of water. None of the other drinks! And, I danced from 5 to 9 PM and got lots of exercise. 

I feel great about this.

 

GRATEFUL by Sheri Hunter

 

 

I celebrated another birthday…well, celebrated is not the right word. I did welcome another year of life since it’s much better than close proximity inside a pine box, but instead of full-on excitement I was a bit down. There is so much I want to do (and have yet to accomplish) and negative thinking began to crop up. I began to consider how far along I could be, how much I could have done in my 42 years if only I had been focused and dedicated towards my various goals.

When I started to whine to a close girlfriend I’ve known since high school she swiped me on my forehead. Really, she power-palmed me with her neat, manicured hand and told me to stop the drama. You’re the same girl – she reminded me – that has earned a MBA, has a happy marriage going on nineteen years, two beautiful children, and a nice home, so why…why am I complaining?  Because there is more, I said to her, so much more that I’ve planned for my life. Then do it, she said, but don’t act like your life has been a failure so far. You’re not dead, she scolded me, and there is nothing to stop you from accomplishing more, but first start appreciating what you have. Be happy with what you have now.

I am learning that gratitude requires discipline and must be exercised regularly. It’s a muscle I must activate daily or the dull-drums, self-defeat, and antagonistic thinking will surely crop up. For each of us, there is something to wake up and cheer about, even if it’s being able to hurl one foot off the bed to the floor…to be able to move and breathe. Today, I received news that the Oakland Press wants me to write a weekly column. Cheers! But, then I began to think, wow, if only this had happened sooner, like ten years ago.  Imagine, I could be writing for the New Yorker Magazine by now. Silence. I know, time to exercise that gratitude muscle again.

What I am praying for regularly in 2010 is not to focus on what’s not done, but what will be done as I move forward, grateful for every opportunity, every goal achieved, and thankful for all the wonder and souls that enrich my life, right now.

 

WORTHWHILE by Michelle Merritt

 

 

It is now 2010 and I am expecting things to be a lot different and better than the last ten years. I am looking for any sign that I am not forgotten, doomed, or cursed. While many of us are going through some type of tough time or another, this is an especially difficult time in which to try and re-group. I, reluctantly, have to admit that I have nearly arrived at a point of acceptance – of my current state, as a continual state. I am fighting that notion tooth and nail. I also think I put off writing any blog posts in hopes of having something good to report.

In addition to unmet expectations, while awaiting something positive, other negative things, that I have decided not to allow to devastate me, have happened and keep challenging me as I try not to lose faith. This has possibly been the most difficult time I have faced, because, for the first time in my life, I truly believe that I have something worthwhile - even great, to offer the world, in various capacities, but I get knocked down at every turn for trying to demonstrate that. If it were only people that I believed to be responsible for what I go through, I could easily dismiss them, but it is the materialization of my fate, such as it is, that I find so disturbing.

I am truly trying to continue to hold on and...“keep hangin”.  Please pray for me as I continue to pray for strength and understanding.    

 Michelle Merritt

Marketing Communications and Management Consultant

michelle@intrinsicmgt.com

www.intrinsicmgt.com 

DIVINE INTERVENTION by Michelle Merritt

 
 

I began this experiment seeking the ability to figure out how to stand and be strong in faith when I really did not feel that I could do so any longer. I was subsequently able to make a commitment to reopen after I had shut down due to disappointment and perceived failure as it pertained to my expectations of myself; to dust myself off and start again.   

  

I said in my last blog entry that I was hoping for a breakthrough and I have received it. I now have a new client and direction for my business, Intrinsic Management. I am a living testimony of the power of The Kim Bettie Show and Kim Bettie as a phenomenal life coach. On our last show, we were joined by the powerful, anointed, Bishop Gregory M. Davis, Sr. Bishop Davis shared many encouraging words with us, but the three most salient and applicable points he made to me were the challenge to step out of my comfort zone, the charge to look at what is in my hand and the reminder that the economy and the job market say one thing, but I need to listen to what God says.

   

When Bishop Davis spoke of being in our comfort zones and having to have extreme faith to get through times of discomfort, I didn’t think that applied to me because I have never, in my adult life, been that “comfortable”. But later I realized that it was my thinking, expectations and ideals of what is necessary to attain success. I was unhappy that the way to achieve success is not as “comfortable” as I’d like it to be. Out-of-the-box thinking and stepping out on extreme faith are uncomfortable; and that is the comfort zone that I need to leave - the belief and expectation that everything has to be a certain way in order for me to feel successful.

  

The second point was when Bishop Davis referred to Exodus 4:2 where God asked Moses what he had in his hand and Moses replied that he had a rod. I needed to be reminded that I, too, have a perfectly good rod – in the form of my God-given passion, gifts, talent, and skills that led me to start my business. However, I got caught up…in the dismal economic picture and my negative view of myself in terms of my long, unsuccessful path (At least that is my perception, as my timetable had not matched up with God’s). 

 

The third point – listening to what God says despite the economic climate and employment outlook – was one of confirmation because I also heard those same words from God while I was preparing to leave for the radio station to be coached by Kim and ministered to by Bishop Davis. If that is not divine intervention, I don’t know what is.

   

My goal now is to commit to my success, myself, my faith and stand once again as I prepare to continue to move forward with my business.  

LIFE IS A JOURNEY by Lisa Mills

 
  

They say life is a journey and about change.  Today I've accepted the challenge of exploring change and taking some risks.  For me, it has always about baby steps when letting down my guard and coming out of my comfort zone.  For the 14 day experiment I will "do unto others as I would want them to do unto me". I'm going to start with being more open to breaking my many rules including emails, texting and facebooking only.  I'm going to actually try to showing the "human side" of me and allow “face” time as opposed to “facebook” time. For most people, this may sound simple; but for me this is a bad habit of six years that I've slipped into….so baby steps it is.  I know and have faith that I have the right tools and food for thought to explore the changes I'll need to make. Changes that will need to come from within in order to TRUST that maybe one day I will have a real meaningful relationship. I'm ready! Baby steps but ready! From the bottom of my heart Kim, thank you for the challenge.

 

BABY STEPS by Lisa Mills

Phew! Talk about brain overload! I have been doing a lot of soul searching in a real effort to convince myself that my way may not necessarily be the right way. Trust me; it’s been an exasperating.  I've revisited past relationships, current friendships and actually considered narrowing down my "potential" list of men who may deserve a little bit more than what I've been giving.

On Saturday, Kim quoted a line from a book she found in her father's possession after he passed away called Harmony in Marriage: “A self-centered person tests everything by the question ‘am I getting the happiness I deserve’…yet it is unfair to not raise the accompanying question ‘am I giving the best it is possible for me to give’.

I'm embarrassed to say that's exactly what I've lacked SINCE divorce. The giving part of the relationship is non existent. I enter potential friendships half heartedly even if I'm interested. Somewhere along the line I've told myself its okay to give 50% and once I see what I need to see you may or may not get a little more. I suppose the fact that no one I’ve ever dated has challenged my behavior or that we laugh and joke that it’s "all about me" has allowed me to keep do things my way. So, maybe that's not so nice and I need to make a few changes.

Yes! Baby steps. I am opening the door for a real relationship! 

SOUL SEARCHING by Sandra Dee

 

I have been soul searching deeply about what I want to accomplish in the years to come and why. I want to have peace with my decision-making, and find a special love that shares the same values I have for my life. I have been emotionally hurt and I had disappointments in past relationships.  I am learning to trust God in the healing process of my emotions and to guard my heart so I will not put myself emotionality out there so quickly, like I have done in the past. 

I have to be spiritually grounded and have that connection to God. God has brought me through the tough times, so I have to give God the praise daily. Without His love for me and giving me the strength to carry on this life journey; I would have never made it through the death of my dear mother (she's my angel). 

My love experiment that I have set for myself is to love me first. God created me to be a loving and nurturing woman. I have to change my thought process so I can have the love that I am seeking in my life. I have to envision myself in a wonderful, healthy love relationship that makes me feel special and see myself capable of giving love back to someone.  I am learning about myself and what I truly want in a relationship. I want to have a loving healthy relationship in my life and I am ready to change to make it happen.

WORK HARD & PLAY HARD by Rian English

A man who finds a wife, finds a good thing Proverbs 18:22. I firmly believe this verse is true, yet I make it rather hard for a man to find me when I spend most of my time working behind a computer!

I am starting to analyze how much time and effort I commit to building my career  and  how little time I spend on nurturing my personal life. 

In My 14 day experiment I intend to make time for myself, attempt to find balance between my personal and professional lives and kick a few bad habits along the way.

As of now I would classify my self as a "recycler." I find that after a stressful work week, I typically want to "recycle" an old relationship and spend my free time with an ex boyfriend because it is a comfortable crutch. He is an amazing person, but the truth is, neither of us want a future together. 

To counter act this bad behavior I am committing to go on a few dates with great guys that I have been putting off. I also plan to leave my office by 5p.m. everyday for the next two weeks. As difficult as this will be, it must be done. I realize I need to work hard AND play hard. 

So wish me luck as I make the necessary changes and let love find its way to me! 

CELBRATE EACH DAY! by Sandra Dee

This experiment has been such a blessing to me because I’ve been able to share my feelings with others and learn about what I am truly looking for in a mate.  I am excited and I am challenging myself to let go of my fears by writing them down in my journal. My list of 30 things that I wanted had been narrowed down to just 5 things that are most important to me. I had to take an honest look at myself and admit the mistakes that I had made in past relationships. I decided to forgive myself for tolerating unhealthy behavior and to forgive the other person.  I had to heal from my wounded heart and move forward in loving again.

I will not settle for less because I deserve the best in a relationship. I have to trust and not build up emotional walls so quickly or move quickly physically. I have to take my time and learn how to move slowly like a snail in a relationship. I have to have patience and not be quick to judge the other person.

I’m going to enjoy myself in the dating process and not put any pressure on myself.  I’ve been socializing with friends and I’m going to take a dance class and learning how to step dance.  I will celebrate each day with a WOW attitude.  I am looking ahead with a positive mindset and many great rewards to enjoy.  I am on my journey, looking for love. Better yet, I am on my journey and love is looking for me.

ON THE PATH by Lisa Mills

If I had to choose the one thing I failed at miserably this week is managing my time. I made two "dates" this week but only actually made it to one. I think I may have over booked myself.  I had a friend who stayed in town an extra night so we could have dinner. As I searched for the energy to pull it together, all I could hear was Kim's quote from the Bible, "do unto others as you would want them do unto you". I kept telling myself this guy may have paid extra to change his flight. The other side of me said, well it's not like he came in town just to see me plus he's originally from here so it shouldn't be a big deal if I don't go out. 

On the day of our date, I had been up since 5:30 in the morning.  I sent an email early afternoon saying I could be available by 5:00 PM. He had a family thing to attend and suggested 8:00 PM. I typically would have said no on a work night plus it was a “Desperate Housewives” night, but I kept hearing Kim's voice saying "what are you willing to give". My intentions were so pure BUT by the time 7:00 rolled around I knew it wasn't happening. I was exhausted. I felt horrible. At first I thought I got off the hook easily but had a hard time reading his tone through emails so I decided to pick up the phone and call. This was my "not so pleasant" phone call.  When I heard him say, "No biggie; this is what I expected from you", my heart dropped. I felt even worst.

If I had to grade myself, I would give myself a C. I'm a work in progress but I'm aware and constantly questioning myself on doing the right thing and being open to find love. All I can say is I'm trying. With God's help and a little voice in my ear, I'm sure I'm on the path to recovery. Baby Steps!!

TRY AGAIN by Sandra Dee

The 14 day love experiment was a wonderful experience for me and allowed me to be open-minded on my thoughts about relationships. I learn about the similarities in what men and women want in a relationship.  I am confident in myself that I can have that special kind of relationship that desire in my life.

I really trust God to lead me and guide my footsteps on this journey of love. I believe that God has the right man for me. Only God can put the right head with the right body. So I will let God handle it.  Only God knows who he is, and where he is, so I'll depend on God to lead me on the path of love.

I am looking for friendship, courtship and then a serious committed relationship.  When that time comes I will be ready. I am expecting great things to happen this year in my life and I am looking forward in celebrating every moment of it. 

I am inspired to change my way of thinking and I am willing to give love a try again.